The world before the Internet: I have a theory about how the Internet is killing/has killed any prospect of the coming of a cultural
movement in the 21st century, but I’ll spare you. All I’ll say is I
feel that the Internet has robbed us of the magic and mystery of the world, and that the trend in corporations hiring qualified college grads to fill
newly created social media vacancies is complete and utter bullshit. The greatest good that has come out of the Internet is Reddit.
The world before technology in general: Technology has made
it virtually (pun observed and fallen flat) impossible to get away with a lie.
Paper trails exist for infinity in cyberspace. You seriously have to be an
idiot to even consider attempting murder in this day and age.
Newspapers: If you haven’t heard already, the news industry
is going south. I can’t be the only one who’s sad for the downfall of the “iron core” of accountability news and the fact that our kin will be Perez Hilton
guzzling idiots.
90’s Nickelodeon Cartoons: I feel incredibly lucky to have grown up during the last decade of quality cartoons. The Spongebob generation and beyond have lost the privilege to important moral takeaways from shows like Hey Arnold.
Traditional Post: Tangible mail is meaningful to me. The
idea of someone going through the trouble of writing the letter by hand,
purchasing a forty-five cent stamp, and dropping it off in a mailbox makes the
sincerity in the “sincerely” so much more authentic.
The Renaissance: I know, I contradict myself, but how awesome and obsolete is the idea of artists being celebrated and commissioned by the wealthy. Seriously though, it would only take a couple of Medicis to get people excited about fine art again. And who knows, maybe a few Da Vinci reincarnates will be revealed.
James Dean: James Franco doesn’t hold a match to him.
Badass blues musicians in the likes of Bo Diddley and
Howlin’ Wolf: They INVENTED a sound that many will unsuccessfully attempt to
replicate forevermore.
Vocals pre-bullshit auto-tuning: I won't discount the magnificent Adele and the highly regarded and personally despised Justin Vernon of Bon Iver, but I wish pop singers today didn't have auto-tuning to fall back on. Their voices must have to really suck for producers to think that distorting them to a degree that sounds alien is more desirable and more marketable. I wish the music industry would snap out of it and start searching for the Robert Plants, Brian Wilsons, Stevie Nicks, and Fiona Apples of our day.
College: Summer vacation, winter recess, spring break, self-discovery, fast food diets, kegs, living a block away from your best friends, needing only one explanation for your actions (it's college!), meeting some of the most intelligent people you have met or will ever meet, sleeping 'til the sun goes down, taking the first step toward independence, pushing buttons, pushing boundaries, pushing drugs (kidding!), and realizing how much you've grown in four years are some of the perks, to name a few, of college life. Enjoy it kiddies!
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